Recently, I attended Heaven Now, an amazing conference in Stockholm, with a team of students and leaders from Bethel Church, California. One Heart Church, a newly planted Church with influences from Bethel, arranged it.
As I have previously felt led to share on this blog, the Lord has brought me through a very healing time this early winter/springtime of 2015. When I came to Heaven Now, I expected God to move mightily with signs and miracles, and to have focus on what he could do through me.
His agenda though, was a bit different. Again, the focus came to be on healing. The first evening I felt a bit weary and oppressed. Then a friend prayed for me and this was broken. One word the students shared that night was for “Hanna”, which I have felt to be a nickname for me spiritually. She said her heart was broken but would be completely healed when going home from the conference. I took this to my heart.
The next day in the afternoon session one lady shared on healing of the heart. She took us through an exercise of speaking to our hearts and connecting with them. As this happened, I received direct revelation of the state of my heart. It was really damaged!
There was a lack in my heart from not receiving enough words of direct appreciation and encouragement as a child. As I worked this through, I was then shown the wrong and damaging words my heart had received in adulthood. When the altar call was made I hurried for prayer. This took me by surprise but it was so profound.
When I received prayer I was told to speak to my heart, to ask forgiveness for neglecting my heart and not taking care of and protecting it. It was actually hard for me to do. My voice was very small. I was also overwhelmed with pain and tears. It felt very deep and really cut to my core.
As I was ministered to, I saw a picture of how the Lord removed pieces of glass from my heart and replaced them with diamonds. I then felt him handing me a new heart.
In the evening service the presence of God was powerful, and I was filled with joy and power. There was such liberty all over the place and the song “we are the sons and daughters of the living God” was again with others proclaimed in worship. There was such a strong spirit of God restoring us to our right identity as his beloved and bold children.
In the morning service I again went for prayer. The guy praying for me said that my heart had been through a lot of patching up in the weekend. Then he looked at me and said “but now you’re ready”. Wow, such relief filled me at those words. Thank you Lord! You make us come alive!
I tell this testimony here just to share how loving and powerful God is. If he has brought me through my valley of tears, into this spacious and restful place, into so much joy and beauty, that I experience now in his presence, then he can and will do the same for you.
Don’t give up. Your mountains are not too high for God to climb. He loves you and cherishes you as his son and daughter. He will turn your mourning into dancing. Trust him and wait for him. He will come through.